Keanu Reeves Writes The Most Depressing Book Ever

Well folks, we knew this was going to happen sooner or later. One too many celebrities have placed a pen in their hands and written a book. Actor, Keanu Reeves, has joined the club and penned a book called Ode to Happiness, where one line reads, "I draw a hot sorrow bath. In my despair room," I'm hoping this is a poor attempt at a metaphor because I think we're traveling down a dark and twisted tunnel that not even Alice could find her way out of. As if this world doesn't have enough depressing things to worry about, now we're expected to read about it for fun as well?

And how did Mr. Reeves get the idea to write such a book? According to him, "...this station was playing, like, an orgy of depressing, self-pitying, nostalgic music ... It was so voluptuously horrible.
And I just started to write on this piece of paper, because I had this image of, you know, that moment when you take a bath, you light that candle, and you're really just kind of depressed." Again with the baths -- what kind of baths has this guy been taking? I find them very relaxing and refreshing, not morbid and depressing. Sounds like Dr. Depression needs to take a break from the end of the world movies (The Day the Earth Stood Still and Constantine to name a few) and get himself signed up for a rom-com STAT!

But the madness doesn't stop there. He also hopes to publish a book of dark poems. "I'm considering another idea I call 'Haikus of Hope,'" Reeves stated. "Basically like, 'I want to kill myself,' and go from there." Someone take this man's pen away from him ASAP!

Source: Popeater